The body language we display is vitally important to communication. It’s how we look for broad signs of evidence of someone’s intentions and thought processes. 

You may have heard that if someone strokes their nose they are telling a lie; if they cross their legs, they are being defensive. The truth is that body language and its interpretation are much more subtle than this. In the early 1970s, researcher Albert Mehrabian suggested that only seven per cent of communication was made up of the words that are spoken, while 93 per cent of meaning was transferred through non-verbal routes – 38 per cent through tone of voice, 55 per cent through body language. 

The exact figures are disputed, but today’s researchers generally suggest that 60 to 80 per cent of a message is transferred by non-verbal means.

The most important thing about non-verbal communication is whether what is being said (the words) agree or not with the tone in which it is said, and/or the body language that accompanies it. In communication, this is referred to as ‘congruence’ and ‘incongruence’.

We can probably all remember occasions when someone has looked us in the eye, and said ‘yes’ while shaking their head. The physical signals betrayed the subconscious thought that did not agree with their words.