The master communicators of all time have one thing in common: amazing rapport. And
you can create rapport on a one-to-one basis or with a group of people. Rapport is simply the process of matching or mirroring someone so that they accept, uncritically, the suggestions you give them.

It relates to establishing trust. Each person is unique and we operate in our model of the world, with attached values, beliefs and attitudes. Rapport is about establishing a bridge whereby you can understand the other person’s model of the world. You do not have to agree with their perspective but you should respect it. It makes any form of communication easier.

For example, a patient may have a particular view about their medicine with which you do not agree. And that’s fine, but, if you do not recognise the patient’s point of view, any advice you provide will not be accepted by them.

This theory of rapport is based on a study conducted at the University of Pennsylvania by Robert Birdwhistle. He discovered that communication could be roughly divided as follows:

• Only seven per cent of communication relates to the words we use (our key words, the amount and size of information ‘chunks’ that we provide and common experiences and associations)
• 38 per cent of communication is relayed by our voice (tone, pitch, quality and speed)
• 55 per cent of communication is directed by our physiology (posture, gestures, facial expression, blinking and breathing).

Unfortunately, many people misinterpret these findings. Of course the words we use are important, it is how we tell or ask people to do something. The study indicates that 93 per cent of what we communicate is based on our tone of voice and physiology.

So, actually, 93 per cent of what we communicate is unconscious. We do it without thinking about it. But the other person will notice and this will influences how they interact with us.

Successful practitioners appreciate how unconscious communication can affect their interactions with others. Create rapport, and rapport creates trust. Once this is established, you create understanding and at this point you are able to provide advice and answer queries that the patient may have.

Given that such a significant percentage of our communication is not relayed in words, it is easy to see how we can break rapport so easily, and we do that every day.